These Things are Killing Me

I bought my last packs of Export 'A' cigarettes at Wizard's today. I decided to do a little review of my smoking history in preparation for my quitting.

I started smoking when I was 22. Previously, I had tried cigarettes from time to time and thought they were n-a-s-t-y, but when my girlfriend, Maggie, had brought home a pack of Yves Saint Laurent cigarettes a friend had left with her, I decided to give them a try. Even with the coughing I experienced, I liked them. This event led to the cornerstone of my smoking philosophy: domestic cigarettes are crap. I quickly became addicted to imported cigarettes.

Over the years I have smoked Craven A, Dunhill, English Ovals, Mild 7, Players, Rothman's, Silk Cut, and Sobranie brands. I finally settled on Macdonald Export 'A' as my favorite brand and have smoked them for most of my life. My addiction is rather constant; after a short "ramping-up" period, I smoked a pack a day. I am so addicted to imported cigarettes that I will rarely smoke if I only have access to domestic brands. For the first eight years of my smoking career I smoked the full-flavor brands, but when I hit 30 I switched to the lighter ones. Interestingly enough, my consumption rate did not go up with the change.

Now the math. At the very least, I have smoked 182,625 cigarettes in my life. I have consumed 219 grams of nicotine and 2.2 kilograms of tar. That's five pounds of tar I've put in my lungs! My addiction has cost me $24,837. For every 3 years I did not smoke, I could have bought myself a kick-ass laptop.

Well, I think 20 years is long enough. It will be hard to quit but I say good riddance.